Memo To Wayne Crookes

Yo! Get a life, dude!

Either that or take a fuckin' pill.

But whatever you decide to do, quit tryin' to rewrite the world just because you don't like the rest of us to have the same freedom of speech you want for yourself.


UPDATE (Tuesday, 1 May, around noon)): See what other bloggers are saying here!

Bloghopping

I haven't gone anywhere in particular. I've been bouncing around the blogosphere, reading and leaving comments in places where I didn't usually go. If I find anything truly fascinating, I'll bring it home with me for show-and-tell.

The weather has turned mild and agreeable, so I'm also spending less time indoors at the keyboard.

The reason I'm not posting much is not because there's nothing to say. There's rather too much to say, and I get to feeling a little overwhelmed by it all. Multi-tasking was not bred into me, I'm afraid.

Creative Fun for Kids of All Ages

My oh my, what I wouldn't have given, when I was a kid, to have had a set of instructions that would let me build my own castle out of cardboard boxes! Or my own fire engine, or pirate ship, or any number of other fantasy projects.

If you have creative kids, this site is perfect for the coming summer. All the projects are printer friendly. All you gotta do is print 'em out and let the kids do the rest. And if you say "Pretty please," they might let you help...

Thanks to Cory for this find!

Victim Disarmament Zones

That would be defined as any place where people are prevented, by law, from defending themselves against assholes with enough firearms to qualify as a third-world nation and who act with all the responsibility of a three-month-old with a full bladder.

The gun-registry nuts are going to go into hyperdrive now, trying to convince the rest of us that we all have to give up our guns.

They can kiss my ass.

The tragedy at Virginia Tech could have been alleviated if weapons had been allowed on campus. One of the victims or one of the bystanders would have been able to put this moron out of their misery before he killed thirty-two other people and left how many more wounded!

This quote from LawDog: "Some maladjusted little bugsnipe gets his mental panties into a bunch and goes flat boiling nutters with a gun in one of the few places where he knows someone isn't going to put him down like a rabid dog during his first magazine."

And from Jean: "School policy disarms everyone on campus, even if they have a CCW, which means they are legally allowed to carry concealed in Virginia. Apparently a bill to do away with this policy never even made it out of committee, with one VT official stating that it was good this happened so everyone would feel safe on campus.

"How safe are people now?"

And how many more people have to die in stupid and preventable situations just like this before the anti-gun nuts finally figure out that their policies are actually getting people killed? Who among the anti-gun crowd wants to take some of the responsibility for the deaths of these people?

An armed society is a polite and respectful society.

By th' way...thanks, Jean, for the title!

No Men Need Apply

And the job? Propogation of the rest of the human race.

The article says "soon" but I'm betting "now." Wait for it, fellow babies! Remember those news stories about having three parents on the birth certificate? Start getting used to the idea of only one parent!

"I don't think there is an ethical barrier, so long as it's safe."

I don't think "ethics" is a viable barrier, either. Ethics is always going to be somebody's subjective opinion, and that opinion is going to be based on personal biases, be they pro or con. The only concern should be safety.

"We are in the process of applying for ethical approval."

Why apply for approval, "ethical" or otherwise? It's always easier to obtain forgiveness (if you really need it) than permission (which you will almost never get). If you can do it, go ahead and do it, dammit! Announce the results after the fact!

The biggest obstruction to this as a method of propagation is that all the progeny will be female. Yeah, I know we all start out as female, but those of us who are destined to become male have this handy-dandy little y-chromosome (or the why-not chromosome, according to some harried girlfriends) that the girls don't get. But that's an easily solved option, too. If you want a boy, just use bone marrow from a male donor.

Reminds me of The Good Doctor's bawdy filk, Clone Of My Own. But I digress.

Seriously, if this thing flies, it very well could be the answer to a lot of current problems. For the most part (no, not all), it would solve the problems of abortions. Most women would have to go deliberately out of their way to get pregnant. Abortion clinics might be able to go out of business. They might turn their talents to becoming conception clinics, instead. The anti-choice crowd would have to find a new target to foam against. What...these conception clinics would be the new targets? Oh, you could be right!

Another problem solved is one of gender selection. Just think -- no more gender lottery! No more biting nails worrying that the latest quackery "guaranteeing" your choice of gender might not work (not to worry...it doesn't).

And deliberate pregnancy would (dare I hope?) possibly lead to licensed parenting. In order to get implanted, a woman might have to be screened, as per any other optional proceedure. Maybe even her partner/boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife might get screened, too. This would do two things, I think: guarantee a wanted child, and almost guarantee a well-raised child.

"A White Paper on genetics suggested that artificial gametes produced from the ordinary "somatic" tissue of the body may be banned from being used to fertilise human eggs by in vitro fertilisation."

Banned? Are they serious? Banning anything just creates a black market for it, yafuckinidiots! If this is really a viable method of procreation, and if the people deem it to be desireable, nothing in the world is going to stop it. Government drones might as well take steps now to license and control it, because as sure as someone said that god made little green apples, it's gonna happen.

And what happens to all the men? Seriously...you don't think men are going anywhere, do you? Not while there's still beer to drink, hockey games to watch, and flatulence to be farted.

The Game That Lasted Forever

Or so it seemed, anyway. Anyone who started out watching/listening with already high blood pressure is probably in hospital right now. And I wouldn't give much for the efficiency of any Canucks or Stars fans at work today.

Daz live-blogged it!

I lost track...anybody know what time/day the game ended?

Canucks Hockey Blog here.

Deep Integration: Alberta And British Columbia

It's called TILMA. It became law on April Fools' Day. And it's giving Murray Dobbin nightmares. To be fair, Murray is not the only one with nightmares about it, but he's the one who was ranting into my ear via a radio talk show as I woke up yesterday.

I am not going to pretend I know everything -- or even a lot -- about this "free trade among provinces" thing yet. What bothers me is that I didn't hear a peep about it before it was too late to do anything, had I wanted to protest it.

Rumor has it that Stephen Harper is very gung-ho about TILMA, and that worries me a little. Where were the press releases? Where was the discussion? If Harper was for it, somebody had to be against it, even if only because Harper was for it...but I heard nothing.

Was I asleep? Did I go deaf and somebody forgot to tell me? Or were we being deliberately kept very much in the dark about a trade agreement that has the potential to affect all our lives in unwanted ways?

What do we know about this agreement, to which our governments bound us, the citizens, without even giving us a chance to say yea or nay? Google it and check the links you get.

From what I've read about it, one thing is for sure -- it's going to destroy the environmental protection laws/efforts as soon as it can find a lawyer to take them to court and whine about the restrictions on business/progress/employment.

Ayn Rand becomes god and concrete becomes the new green. James Watt writes the new anthem in the key of fuck off. Chretien explains the whole thing in both official languages, several semi-official languages, a few unrecognizeable languages, and out of all sides of his mouth simultaneously. Gomery slaps a publication ban on it. Health Canada prints a new food guide in which it recognizes effluent as a vegetable. Environment Canada teams up with PETA, establishing a new zoo, with trees behind the fences instead of animals. Lawyers become the new priests, and courts become the new temples.

Have I left anything out?

Oh, yeah...Alberta and BC are only the starters for this batch of sour dough. Saskatchewan wants in (do the residents know about this?). Then the ROC. Then the Lower Forty-Eight. It's spreading like a disease and money is its vector.

I am reminded of a scene in the movie Independence Day -- several people on top of a skyscraper having a wild party, holding up signs that say, "Welcome! Make Yourselves At Home!"

The only cure was prevention. And it's too late.