Friday, July 06, 2007

Deadly Sincerity

We got home last night to find the apartment door jimmied open, a lot of valuable items gone, and everything else pulled out of drawers and closets,and dumped in heaps on beds and in the middle of the floor. A good-sized three-bedroom apartment full of looks-like-a-drunken-tornado-hit-it.

Two of the six guitars were gone (and the other four stacked and waiting with other stuff in the hallway -- these guys were intending to come back), plus cash, jewelry, the entire DVD collection, my toolbox full of Snap-On screwdrivers (a new set of burglar tools for someone), all the prescription drugs in the house, and various and sundry other goodies that I'm still finding out about. Oh...and my "essential" ID -- birth certificate, DL and SSN card.

Looks like a great time to change my identity. The old one is no good anymore.

The fridge and freezer had been ransacked, as well as the pantry. Food packages were opened, dumped out, and the contents ground into the floor. Melting ice cream fucking everywhere! And that's what really pisses me off. Not the theft -- that's pretty much the way the world works these days -- but the waste and destruction.

So far, roughly guessing, somewhere between five and six thousand dollars walked out of here yesterday in broad daylight, in my own shopping carts, fer crissake, and nobody in the building heard or saw a damned thing...

Now, just in case the perps know how to read, and they know enough about me to read this, I have a message for them:

You think you got yourself a couple of nice, new daggers to play with yesterday, don't you? Guess again. What you have in your temporary possession are my athames. And with that, you've sealed your own death.

Felt good in your hands, didn't they? Nice weight, excellect balance, sharp enough to shave with? Felt kinda warm and maybe a little "tingly" when you picked them up? Did you not wonder why they were carefully wrapped in silk and then again in robes and tucked away in a special drawer with other things that might have alerted you to the identity of your victim had you been smart enough to pay attention?

Let me clue you in, you miserable pieces of shit. I am not a nice, polite, "an-it-harm-none" type Wiccan. I am a thoroughly-versed-in-the-arts, well-practiced, "know-what-ye-do" type Witch. Those blades are tuned to me, and right now, they're planning how best to go about initiating the process of your earthy demise.

There is no pardon. I suggest you make whatever final arrangement you can, and soon. Karma can be a bitch, but she's a playful puppy compared to that which hunts you now.

With deadly sincerity



There were two of them. Three is a possibility, but not a big one. Three would be colliding with one another. Two.

There is a high probability that one is female. Things went missing that only a female would consider taking. And a fairly young female, at that.

They were young. Possibly late teens, but not children, and not living at home with their parents.

At least one of them is a chocaholic. Either that, or seriously jonesing. How bad does it have to be for them to steal boxes of baking chocolate and a half-full bottle of chocolate sauce?

The building security guards don't know it, yet, but they interrupted the thieves and scared them off. Security knows something. They're just not aware of it, yet. I will be getting them more involved.


Blogger Howlin' Hobbit said...

That is fucked.

I generally hate the ol' "cyber hug" bull, but since I cannot make it up to where you are, know that I'd give you a big one.

I woke up one morning to find that the house had been burglarized by the local crackheads while we slept. (They took one thing that was lying not a foot from my head.) I do know how it feels.

Let the karma roll.

Friday, July 06, 2007 8:21:00 PM  
Blogger Chimera said...

I generally hate cyber-hugs, too, but since I know you can't be here, your offer is accepted with much appreciation.

Karma too tame. Sending Nazgul's ugly bigger brothers.

Saturday, July 07, 2007 6:34:00 AM  
Blogger JeanC said...

Thank bloody well sucks. i know the twits are going to find their karma coming down on them with hobnail boots.

I've only dealt with a break in once. My grandma's house after she and grandpa had died. I was keeping an eye on it, going up to Spokane every couple weeks and staying for the weekend. Got there to find it broken into. Luckily they didn't get much as most of the real valuable stuff was gone. They did get a fritzy TV and the beaver skin coat stashed in the basement. The really icky thing was they'd used the toilet, but the water had been shut off. ICK!!

Saturday, July 07, 2007 9:57:00 AM  
Blogger Chimera said...

I'm still cleaning up and cataloguing the missing items. They left the brand-new TV, DVD player, and VHS player (along with the VHS tapes -- they're not sexy anymore, I guess), but they took a half-full bottle of laundry detergent!

Saturday, July 07, 2007 10:06:00 AM  
Blogger Dez said...

Theft is always a personal violation, but B&E is practically rape, from the emotional impact of it. My heart goes out to you.

As you know, I have relatives who live close to you. The Spice Girl, in particular, might be able to help. I will let her know.

You know that you have but to ask, and I will be there.

Saturday, July 07, 2007 11:34:00 AM  
Blogger Chimera said...

I have met The Spice Girl, yes. She lives just down the hall from us (sorry we weren't home when you called, by th' way...your jacket is still hanging safely in the closet).

Update on items took/missing:

They took my hard case for my glasses. They left two (2) forty-ounce bottles of 190 proof (95%) grain alcohol(!) that were a mere three feet away from the glasses case.

There's a punchline in there somewhere...

Saturday, July 07, 2007 12:13:00 PM  
Blogger Zorpheous said...


Damn girl, what can I possible say,...

I guess the important thing is that you are safe and no one important to you was physically harmed. I know the emotion damage you feel, your personal and private space being violated will take time to heel, but it will. You will come out of this stronger and better.

Might I recommend that you start checking the pawnshops in your area for your stuff, not just to reclaim it, but to also possibly catch the perps who did this.

Stay strong,...

PS, I take it they left your computer, no? ;-)

Sunday, July 08, 2007 12:23:00 PM  
Blogger Chimera said...

Yeah, they left the computer. Guess it's not upscale enough for them.

And as for the "emotional damage" that a lot of people (including some of my family and neighbors) think I'm feeling...uh-uh. None. I'm mad because I didn't get home before they got away, and I didn't have time to inflict any damage on them in person.

Interesting things about the pawnshop idea, though -- the cop told me the same thing. Check the local pawn shops (apparently it's not part of the cops' job anymore), and if I find any familiar items, contact the cop (if he's available) and tell him where it is and he will go get it.

Doncha fuckin' love it? I get to do all the goddamn work, and the cop gets ta take all the glory!

Sunday, July 08, 2007 12:39:00 PM  
Blogger SUZANNE said...

I'm really sorry about the break-in. I hope they find the culprits.

Sunday, July 08, 2007 12:57:00 PM  
Blogger Chimera said...

Hi, Suzanne...nice to see you here. And thanks.

Personally, I hope they find them only after it's too late to treat them to the hospitality of our "justice" system. I want these MFs to die wondering what was happening to them...

No, sometimes I'm not very nice, am I?

Monday, July 09, 2007 9:50:00 AM  
Anonymous stageleft said...

That really and truly sucks chimera, as others have said, at least you and yours were not harmed, and it sounds like you've got the other stuff well in hand.

Reading your post and comments I can understand the anger, especially at the loss of the athames - I am (however) reminded of some words regarding that...

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." (Buddha)

Go gcuire Dia an t-ádh ort

Monday, July 09, 2007 12:08:00 PM  
Blogger Dez said...

I don't think this is just about anger anymore, if you don't mind my saying.

At some point it is about education. People need to understand that there are consequences to their actions.

I don't think the ones who trashed the place were pros, most likely teenagers making mischief and vandalism and taking the cool stuff. They need to learn a lesson, but mostly they need to serve as an example of how not to behave.

Whadya think? Would hanging their headless corpses upside-down by a third-floor balcony with their entrails hanging down to the ground be too much?

The crows would feast!

Monday, July 09, 2007 2:13:00 PM  
Blogger Balbulican said...

Had that happen too, and the same kind of silly, glittery jewelry and easily pawnable shit, with some fairly valuable stuff in plain sight left behind.

It's a weirdly awful feeling - someone said "violation", and that's right, it seems oddly personal - but it does go away in fairly short order.

Be brave. Be calm. Wait for the Signs.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 5:34:00 AM  
Anonymous Ian Scott said...

I am sorry to read this! I hope true and real justice will prevail.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 10:18:00 AM  
Blogger Chimera said...

SL: Go raibh maith agat. I appreciate the thoughts, but I'm not holding on to my anger -- I'm cultivating it into useful energy. Buddha, for all his wisdom, didn't know how to do that.

Dez: Interesting visuals, but the downstairs neighbors are already unhappy with the seed husks the birds drop on their patios (try as I might to prevent it). I can't imagine what their reaction would be to blood and guts festooned like Christmas garland...

Balb: Aye.

Ian: No fear, mate.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 10:34:00 AM  
Blogger Chimera said...

Oops. The rest of my comment to balbulican didn't come through:

Aye. You've got the flavor of it.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 2:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any further updates on this?

Tuesday, July 17, 2007 8:16:00 PM  
Blogger Chimera said...

Not really. Like balb said, they took stuff that was easily sold on the street or from a blanket on the sidewalk. We are keeping eyes open for the two big items that are easily identified (but only by us, because we're the only ones who know what to look for), but we really don't expect to see any of this stuff back.

Thursday, July 19, 2007 11:38:00 AM  
Blogger Cait said...

In defense of cops, you are more likely to recognize your stuff than they are. It only makes sense for you to scout it out and call cops if you find it. Based on your description of what was taken, I'm guessing, as you said, these are young guys, and probably drug addicts feeding a habit. The stuff they took makes no sense. They probably were high. The element of vandalism says they're not pros. I'm glad to hear you're pissed about it. I think it's the only sane response. I'm just glad you weren't there when it happened. Unless you're suitably armed, of course, in which case, may the little pissers bring it on.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007 9:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Tuesday, January 05, 2010 12:54:00 AM  

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