On Getting Old...
I needed a laugh this morning. So guess what showed up in my mailbox? Timing. It's all about timing...
1."OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make out," and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!"
2."OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
3."OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
4."OLD" IS WHEN..... Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
5."OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
6."OLD" IS WHEN...... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
7."OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today.
8."OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
9."OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not having to get up to pee.
10. "OLD" IS WHEN... The wife asks you to nibble on her ear and you have to go get your teeth..... (courtesy DazzlinDino in the comments)
Thanks, cousin!
1."OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make out," and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!"
2."OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
3."OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
4."OLD" IS WHEN..... Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
5."OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
6."OLD" IS WHEN...... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
7."OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today.
8."OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
9."OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not having to get up to pee.
10. "OLD" IS WHEN... The wife asks you to nibble on her ear and you have to go get your teeth..... (courtesy DazzlinDino in the comments)
Thanks, cousin!
posted by Chimera at 7:41 AM
2 Comments:
Old is when I'm standing in a river, and there's a hatch on, and I can't god damn see the hook eye of the fly I'm trying to tie onto my leader!!!
And I'm spending more time trying to tie on the goddamn fly, because I can't see it, while there are fishing rising everywhere.
I guess I need to go see the eye doctor.
*sigh*
9."OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not having to get up to pee.
OH MAN that one almost killed me......PMSL....
#10. The wife asks you to nibble on her ear and you have to go get your teeth.....
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