Fast Chili

I don't usually blog cooking and recipes, but successful experiments need to be bragged about, so...

A couple months ago, in an issue of Men's Health (the online version), this recipe for chili appeared:

What you'll need:

1/2 onion
2 cloves garlic
1 Tbsp mixed herbs
1 tsp olive oil
4 oz ground turkey
2 tomatoes, diced
2 c pinto beans
1 c button mushrooms
2 bay leaves
Dash of black pepper
1 Tbsp paprika
2 chili peppers, chopped

In a pan, saute the onion, garlic, and herbs in the olive oil for 5 minutes. Place the turkey in the pan and saute for 10 minutes. Add the tomatoes, beans, and mushrooms and let the mixture simmer for another 5 minutes. Finally, add the bay leaves, black pepper, paprika, and chili peppers. Let it all simmer for 20 minutes. Remove the bay leaves. If you can bear the wait, let it sit for a day: It tastes even better the next day.

Now, eveyone here at the Cavern really likes chili. I'm the minority vote that keeps having problems after the fact, so we don't have it very often. But this notation at the bottom caught my eye:

Note: If you're worried about the "rumblings" later from the beans, buy canned beans, rinse them well in a colander, and puree them in a blender or food processor with a little water. It'll break down the fiber and carbohydrates often associated with gas.

Aha! I thought. Canned, rinsed beans were the answer to the problem? And if I'm going to experiment with changing one thing, why not change a few more things while I'm at it?

My thoughts in note form:

1. Half an onion is wimpy. Use two.

2. Ditto two cloves of garlic -- use the whole head.

3. I have no idea what "mixed herbs" are, but this recipe doesn't mention chili powder, so let's change it to chili powder.

4. I never measure olive oil -- it's good for you, so get rid of the measurement (which is also wimpy).

5. And now to the real bone of contention: nobody here likes turkey, ground or otherwise, so get rid of it altogether. Use ground beef -- or to make it vegetarian, skip the meat altogether and use kernel corn (frozen, about 1 pound).

6. Two tomatoes don't sound like enough, unless they're the size of Nova Scotia; and if we're already using canned beans, why not canned tomatoes?

7. Pinto beans we don't have. We do have red kidney and garbanzo, so we'll just substitute those -- beans is beans, right?

8. One cup mushrooms? Button mushrooms? Nobody here has the patience to pick through the mushrooms for the ones you could sew on a shirt (if you could sew), so let's just say a large handful of mushroom, chopped if necessary. Two handsful if you like mushrooms a lot.

9. We don't have a bay tree, so screw the bay leaf.

10. Salt and pepper are usually added after the cooking is done.

11. And since paprika is added for color more than anything else, and the chili powder is already red, ditto the tomatoes, dump the paprika.

12. I actually bought the chili peppers, and ended up not having to use them on account of I'd accidentally also bought the HOT version of chili powder!

And the altered recipe, after fussing and playing with it a few times, came out like this:

2 medium onions, chopped

1 head garlic, roughly chopped

1 - 4 Tablespoons chili powder (to taste, obviously -- start with one; you can always add more)

olive oil

1 pound frozen kernel corn

1 28-ounce can crushed tomatoes

1 28-ounce can whole tomatoes, drained and rough chopped

3 19-ounce cans red kidney beans, drained and rinsed

1 19-ounce can garbanzo beans, drained and rinsed

2 handfuls muchrooms in bite-sized pieces

2 chili peppers (optional)

First, build yourself a Bloody Mary with the juice you drained from the canned whole tomatoes. Waste not, want not.

Heat a large dutch oven to medium , and after the pot is hot, then add the olive oil (hot pan, cold oil, food won't stick -- the late Jeff Smith {The Frugal Gourmet}. He was right). Saute the onions and garlic until just translucent (no browning), then add the chili powder, stirring quickly. Don't inhale the steam! Add the crushed tomatoes, the whole tomatoes, the corn, the mushrooms. Stir occasionally until corn is no longer frozen and the mushrooms have started to soften. Add the drained and rinsed beans, and mix well. Reduce heat to low-medium, and let it all simmer for half an hour to an hour, stirring occasionally.

If you really prefer meat in your chili, use a pound of ground beef, cooked and well drained, in the place of the corn.

Serve in huge bowls with sour cream, grated cheddar cheese, chopped green onion, crusty bread, and maybe a green salad.

It's better the second day, so make enough for leftovers.